Why Writing a Heartfelt Letter Matters

At its core, expressing love through words creates a deeper connection between people. Love makes us feel good, not just emotionally but physically too—it has been shown to reduce stress and even ease pain. Writing a letter allows you to put your feelings into words, creating something tangible that the recipient can treasure for years to come. Let’s dive into the steps that will help you write a letter that will truly touch someone’s heart.

Tips for Crafting a Meaningful Letter

Writing a heartfelt letter is all about authenticity and personal connection. There’s no strict formula, but a few key elements can guide you. Here are some things to consider as you begin:

Choose the Right Paper and Pen

The medium is important! Whether you’re using fancy stationery, a blank card, or just some plain writing paper, make sure it’s something that feels right for the occasion. And don’t forget a smooth-flowing pen—something that will help you concentrate on writing your emotions clearly and easily.

Find Your Genuine Voice

When it comes to writing your letter, authenticity is key. Resist the temptation to use fancy or complicated words you wouldn’t typically use in everyday conversation. The person reading it will appreciate the real you much more. Speak from your heart, and the connection will come through.

Think About the Recipient’s Feelings

Before you start writing, take a moment to reflect on how you want the person to feel when they read your letter. Whether you want them to feel cherished, inspired, or adored, keeping this in mind will help guide your tone throughout the letter.

Open with Warmth and Intimacy

Begin your letter in a way that feels natural to you. Skip the formal “Dear [Name]” unless that’s how you typically address them. Use the nickname or term of endearment that you usually use when you’re together to make it feel personal and intimate right from the start.

Share Why You’re Writing Now

While it’s not mandatory, explaining why you’re writing can help give context to your words. Whether it’s because you’ve been thinking about them a lot recently, or you want to mark a special occasion, starting your letter with a reason can set the tone and make it easier to express your emotions.

Highlight the Things You Love About Them

This is your chance to remind the recipient of why you love them. Be specific—don’t just say “I love you”; point out the qualities, actions, or quirks that make them special to you. These can be big things like their kindness or sense of humor, or little things, like how they always make your coffee in the morning.

Embrace Their Flaws

Everyone has things about themselves they’re insecure about. Take the opportunity to show your partner that you love them fully, including the parts they might not always love about themselves. Whether it’s a physical feature or a personality trait, acknowledging these imperfections can make them feel accepted and loved.

Add Some Passion

If it suits your relationship, add a little spice to your letter. A playful or romantic sentence can remind your partner of the chemistry you share and keep things fun. It’s your letter, so make it reflect your bond!

Reflect on Your Journey Together

Don’t be afraid to mention challenges you’ve faced together. Highlighting the hard times you’ve come through shows how resilient your relationship is. Celebrate the strength of your partnership, and the bond you’ve built.

Close with Optimism for the Future

To wrap things up, talk about the future. Whether it’s something as big as plans to have a family or as simple as future adventures together, ending your letter with a hopeful message about the road ahead will reinforce your commitment and love.

Example Heartfelt Letters

Sometimes it helps to read examples to spark your creativity. Remember, these are just guides; your letter should be as unique as your relationship.

Example 1:

My Dearest Flo,

I’m writing this today because something you did at the supermarket made me realize just how much I adore you. The way you helped that elderly man without a second thought just shows the depth of your kindness and generosity. I’m so lucky to have you in my life.

Thank you for always thinking of me, even in the little things like packing my lunches and leaving sweet notes inside. It means the world to me.

Last summer was tough, with us being apart, but we got through it. And I know that if we ever face challenges again, we’ll make it through together. I’d endure anything to see your beautiful smile each day.

I’m looking forward to spending the rest of my life with you. I love you so much.

Forever yours,

Will

Example 2:

My Bear,

Happy Valentine’s Day!

I didn’t want to send you another generic card this year because you deserve so much more. I still can’t believe how lucky I am to have met you that night at the pub. Despite losing a little money, I gained something far more valuable: you.

Your sense of humor always cracks me up, even during the most mundane moments, like picking out carpet! I love that about you.

I also admire your strength and your incredible love for our family, especially when we were at the hospital with Elsie. You were my rock.

I’ve been thinking a lot about our first kiss lately. What do you say we recreate it tonight? I’ve arranged a babysitter, and I’ve got a surprise dinner planned.

I can’t wait for the future with you, and I know we’ll make amazing parents together.

All my love,

Wren

Delivering Your Heartfelt Letter

Once your letter is written, it’s time to share it! Whether you hand it over in person or send it through the mail, placing it in an envelope adds an extra element of suspense and anticipation. For an even more personal touch, consider sealing it with a wax seal.

Writing a heartfelt letter takes time and thought, but it’s an incredibly meaningful way to connect with someone you care about. With these tips, you’re ready to put your emotions into words and share a beautiful gesture of love.

The post How to Write a Heartfelt Letter appeared first on World Letter Writing Day.

I can’t pretend to be a dab hand at love-letter writing myself, and if you aren’t either but would like to be, read on.

Help is not just at hand – it’s here, now, in this very blog you’re reading.

Hand-written love letters are a thing of the past – and that’s sad, isn’t it?

I met a group of young people the other day, not one of whom had ever sent or received a love letter. One of them claimed not even to know what a love letter is. Seriously, he’d heard about ‘French letters’ and said he’d always assumed ‘love letters’ were some form of old-fashioned contraceptive. I put him right.

I asked a girl in the group how she would indicate to a young man that he had taken her fancy, if not with a love letter. She said she text him an emoji of a smiley face. And if you fancied him a lot? I asked. ‘A smiley face with a tongue hanging out,’ she replied. And how would he respond if he fancied you? I enquired. ‘He’d send me an emoji of an aubergine,’ she said with satisfaction.

She can do better than that, surely? We can all do better than that – and we have 72 hours left before Valentine’s Day 2019 in which to try.

Yes, this is the week in which to send the love of your life the letter of your life! Welcome to the Brandreth master-class on the art of love-letter writing.

Don’t worry, the rules I am about to share have been compiled by me, but they are not my rules: these are the lessons of history.

In preparing this crash course in love-letter writing, I have taken soundings from a number of authorities (all female), ranging from women of experience (the great historian, Lady Antonia Fraser, has compiled the definitive anthology of love letters) to the three young, unattached journalists, aged 26, 27, and 30. As part of my researches, I even made a pilgrimage to Ladbroke Grove and took a masterclass of my own from the award-winning novelist and literary historian, Dame Margaret Drabble, who in one of her novels evoked the love affair and marriage of Robert and Elizabeth Browning – ‘their story is the paradigm of perfect love’, she says – and has read more widely, more wisely, than anyone I know.

So, if you want to woo and win – or simply wow – the one you love, here are the rules, drawn from the experience of the great love-letter writers of yesteryear:

1. Be passionate.

‘A love letter must be full of fire,’ says Drabble. ‘Napoleon wrote cracking good love letters to Josephine. William Wordsworth wrote quite passionately to Mary. Jane Carlyle poured energy and all her literary talent into the letters she wrote to Thomas Carlyle. Jane Austen would write you a witty letter, but she was too proper to be passionate. A good love letter takes risks, feels dangerous. Women, of course, were not allowed to take the initiative in these matters, but had they been, I think Charlotte Bronte would have written you a letter that was suitably impassioned.

‘I would have welcomed a letter of admiration from Lord Byron. He wrote brilliant love letters to everyone – girls, women, men, boys, Caroline Lamb, his half-sister, the sixty year old woman with whom he was having an affair when he was half her age, even his wife. I wouldn’t want a letter from Robert Browning. He belongs to Mrs Browning. They were equally in love and it was a love that endured. But Byron was different. You could have a fling with Byron and move on. No harm done.’

2. Be thoughtful.

According to Lady Antonia Fraser, looks count. ‘How important is the actual physical appearance of the letter! A thousand years ago at the court of the Japanese Emperor, no gentleman would have dreamt of spending a night with a lady without sending round a letter of appreciation the morning after – a letter in which the thickness, size, design and colour of the paper all helped to indicate the emotional mood that the writer wished to suggest – the finishing touch being supplied by the branch or spray of blossom which it was de rigeur to attach to it.’

Margaret Drabble is confident that electronic communication won’t supplant the traditional letter, because the letter is tangible and portable. ‘You can carry a letter with you, hide it under the pillow, keep it in a shoe box with all the others as solid proof of love.’ Antonia Fraser quotes Edith Wharton summing up the crucial moment of the letter’s arrival: ‘the first glance to see how many pages there are, the second to see how it ends, the breathless first reading, the slow lingering over each phrase and each word, the taking possession, the absorbing of them, one by one, and finally the choosing of the one that will be carried in one’s thoughts all day, making an exquisite accompaniment to the dull prose of life.’

3. Be yourself.

Drabble offers reassurance for those who feel they may not have a professional writer’s facility with words. ‘With a love letter, passion, feeling, sincerity are what count. Simplicity of expression can be a virtue. Good writers don’t necessarily write exciting love letters. Fine words can stand in the way of true love. Bernard Shaw is a good example of a writer who managed to hide his feelings behind his words.’

4. Be prosaic.

In 1857 Baudelaire sent a collection of his poetry to his mistress, Madame Sabatier, with a covering note: ‘Farewell, dear lady. I kiss your hand as a sign of my utter devotion. All the verses contained between page 84 and page 105 are yours alone.’ Shakespeare, Byron, the Brownings all wrote love letters in the form of poetry, but Drabble advises, ‘Unless you are a poet, save your blushes and stick to prose.’

(When I was an MP I remember a tender-hearted Tory MP (Mrs Thatcher’s successor at Finchley, a married man, a father of three, and a lay preacher) who succumbed to the charms of his twenty-two year-old researcher and was forced to leave the government when samples of his love poetry found their way into the pages of the News of the World. Apparently there was no affair, simply a sentimental attachment. The Chief Whip was not to be mollified. ‘Whether he’s giving her one or not is immaterial,’ he barked. ‘What we can’t have is any more of his atrocious poetry getting into the public domain. It’s a disgrace to the administration.’)

5. Be sexy.

My trio of young journalists expressed enthusiasm for love letters that are ‘a bit raunchy’. ‘Sexy is good,’ said Julia (30). I showed the trio Chopin’s letter to his mistress Delphine Potocka in which he explains that the sexual act robs him of his creativity – ‘a man wastes his life-giving precious fluid for a moment of ecstasy’- and counts the cost: ‘Who knows what ballades, polonaises, perhaps an entire concerto, have been engulfed in your little D flat major . . .’ ‘I’m sorry,’ said the journalists, pulling a face in unison, ‘that’s a real turn-off.’

According to Margaret Drabble, ‘James Joyce wrote some very outspoken letters to Nora Barnacle – open, sexual and very persuasive. He made it clear what he wanted and she certainly gave in to it. The secret, I think, is to pace yourself. A letter should contain surprises. Unexpected explicitness is very powerful.’

6. Be positive.

Drabble and Fraser report that many of the most compelling love letters in literature have been riven with angst, fuelled by frustration, inspired by adversity, but the young women journalist in my sample are adamant that they want joyful love letters, filled with hope and humour, not anxiety. ‘And I want a letter that’s more about me than it is about him,’ says Sara, 27. ‘A self-absorbed lover is a real bore, especially if he’s always down-in-the mouth. If you can find a bloke who gives the impression that he’s more interested in you than in himself you’re onto a winner.’

7. Be sparing.

Antonia Fraser believes that when it comes to love, persistence pays. She quotes Ovid approvingly: ‘In time refractory oxen come to plough, in time horses are taught to bear the pliant reins, an iron ring is worn by constant use . . . Only persevere, you will overcome Penelope herself.’

Margaret Drabble isn’t so sure. ‘Distrust a man who writes too many letters,’ she says. ‘Not only can the weight of the correspondence be a bit overwhelming, but you have to ask yourself if love-making by letter isn’t a substitute for love-making in fact. Some people use the letter as a way of keeping the relationship at bay. There are six hundred pages of Kafka’s letters to Félice Bauer. They were twice engaged, but each time he called it off. He had a commitment problem, clearly, and found more satisfaction in writing the letters than in marrying the lady.’

Drabble’s ideal correspondent would not write too frequently, nor at too great a length. His letters would be passionate, bold, reckless, surprising – and heartfelt, at least at the time. I suggest to her that it’s a tall order. She raises her whisky to me: ‘If you can’t manage it, don’t despair. You can always go for the Cyrano option and call in the professionals. There’s a respectable tradition of inarticulate chaps getting articulate chaps to write their love letters for them.’

That’s it. If you can’t do it yourself, find a man who can.

Tomorrow, I’ll try to post some examples – moments from some of the great love-letters of history. I’d do it now, but I’ve got a letter to write.

The post How to write a love letter – the Valentine’s Day Masterclass appeared first on World Letter Writing Day.